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Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
Actually I don't remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.
Actually I don't remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story read more
Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.
Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.
Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.
Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.
Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.
When someone hands you a flyer, it's like they're saying here you throw this away.
When someone hands you a flyer, it's like they're saying here you throw this away.
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
