The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what read more

I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.

If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?

If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is having lots to do and not doing it.

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is having lots to do and not doing it.

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them read more

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.

I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest.

I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest.

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.