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Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

by Oscar Wilde Found in: Funny Quotes, Marriage Quotes,
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  21  /  18  

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

by Paul Klee Found in: Funny Quotes,
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My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
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Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
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As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

by Buddy Hackett Found in: Funny Quotes,
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I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way to literal for me.

I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way to literal for me.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
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I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what read more

I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.

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The bikini is the most important thing since the atom bomb.

The bikini is the most important thing since the atom bomb.

by Diana Vreeland Found in: Funny Quotes,
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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

by Victor Borge Found in: Funny Quotes,
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