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I admit that: my wife is outspoken, but by whom?

I admit that: my wife is outspoken, but by whom?

by Sam Levenson Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  48  /  22  

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

by Red Skelton Found in: Funny Quotes,
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Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  18  /  18  

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

by Mark Twain Found in: Funny Quotes,
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I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

by Warren Buffett Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  23  /  40  

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

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Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.

by John Wilmot Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  19  /  26  

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

by Yogi Berra Found in: Funny Quotes,
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By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out.rn

By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out.rn

by Richard Dawkins Found in: Funny Quotes,
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