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  10  /  19  

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such read more

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling.

by Arthur Brisbane Found in: Funny Quotes,
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A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.

A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.

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How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she read more

How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.

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A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was read more

A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.

by Rodney Dangerfield Found in: Funny Quotes,
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Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.

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Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

by John Lennon Found in: Funny Quotes, Planning Quotes,
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A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

by Erma Bombeck Found in: Funny Quotes,
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Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who read more

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

by George Bernard Shaw Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.

by Clint Eastwood Found in: Marriage Quotes,
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