Maxioms by Mitch Hedberg
My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening read more
My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening down there. Who is the real hero?
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
I wrote a letter to my dad, I was going to write 'I really enjoyed being here', but I accidentally read more
I wrote a letter to my dad, I was going to write 'I really enjoyed being here', but I accidentally wrote 'rarely' instead of 'really'. But I wanted to use it, I didn't want to cross it out, so I wrote 'I rarely drive steamboats, Dad. There's a lot of sh*t you don't know about me. Quit trying to act like I'm a steamboat operator.' I know this letter took a harsh turn right away.
I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.
I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!
