I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them read more

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another read more

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in read more

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.

I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck read more

Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.