I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was read more

A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane.

In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

To know one's self is wisdom, but not to know one's neighbors is genius.

To know one's self is wisdom, but not to know one's neighbors is genius.