Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.

Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are read more

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.