As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say, “I want to see the manager.”

After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say, “I want to see the manager.”

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

What you get free costs too much.

What you get free costs too much.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

To know one's self is wisdom, but not to know one's neighbors is genius.

To know one's self is wisdom, but not to know one's neighbors is genius.

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.