The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

What you get free costs too much.

What you get free costs too much.

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story read more

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.

I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer.

I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.