Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

I speak two languages, Body and English.

I speak two languages, Body and English.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.