Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.

Friends are like bras: close to your heart and there for support.

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes.

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.