Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range.

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range.

Laughter and orgasm are great bedfellows

Laughter and orgasm are great bedfellows

Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.

My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is read more

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex

Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither