Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. read more

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.

Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.

Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.

I married beneath me. All women do.

I married beneath me. All women do.

A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.

A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.

The only time you really live fully is from thirty to sixty. The young are slaves to dreams; the old read more

The only time you really live fully is from thirty to sixty. The young are slaves to dreams; the old servants of regrets. Only the middle-aged have all their five senses in the keeping of their wits.

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends up blocking his retreat.

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends up blocking his retreat.

All women are misfits. We do not fit into this world without amputations. -Marge Piercy.

All women are misfits. We do not fit into this world without amputations. -Marge Piercy.

To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.

To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.