Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. read more

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".

Women like silent men. They think they're listening.

Women like silent men. They think they're listening.

Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what read more

Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what you are getting.

Roots is not just a saga of my family. It is the symbolic saga of a people.

Roots is not just a saga of my family. It is the symbolic saga of a people.

We say that a girl with her doll anticipates the mother. It is more true, perhaps, that most mothers are read more

We say that a girl with her doll anticipates the mother. It is more true, perhaps, that most mothers are still but children with playthings.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.

I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.