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    Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

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  27  /  36  

Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.

Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.

by Langston Hughes Found in: Humor Quotes,
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  17  /  12  

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. - Points of View.

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. - Points of View.

by Agnes Repplier Found in: Humor Quotes,
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A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the read more

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road.

by Henry Ward Beecher Found in: Humor Quotes,
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If they ever come up with a swashbuckling School, I think one of the courses should be Laughing, Then Jumping read more

If they ever come up with a swashbuckling School, I think one of the courses should be Laughing, Then Jumping Off Something.

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  27  /  28  

That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.

That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.

by Horace Walpole Found in: Humor Quotes,
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  23  /  25  

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humour.

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humour.

by Edward Albee Found in: Humor Quotes,
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  22  /  16  

When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.

When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.

by Gloria Vanderbilt Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to read more

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says 'You.' After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

by Jack Handey Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Unconscious humor.

Unconscious humor.

by Samuel Butler Found in: Humor Quotes,
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