If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and read more

If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

Wit is cultured insolence.

Wit is cultured insolence.

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully.

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully.

My mother was awarded the Serbian medal of freedom
for raising 3 dysfunctional Croatian sons.

My mother was awarded the Serbian medal of freedom
for raising 3 dysfunctional Croatian sons.

Nobody ever died of laughter.

Nobody ever died of laughter.

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the read more

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road.

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone's neck, and the guy screams and tries to read more

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone's neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter read more

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.

I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.

I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.