Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

There is no love sincerer than the love of food.

There is no love sincerer than the love of food.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I am not a glutton - I am an explorer of food

I am not a glutton - I am an explorer of food

Sacred cows make the best hamburger

Sacred cows make the best hamburger

Worthless people live only to eat and drink; people of worth eat and drink only to live.

Worthless people live only to eat and drink; people of worth eat and drink only to live.

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

Mosquitoes remind us that we are not as high up on the food chain as we think

Mosquitoes remind us that we are not as high up on the food chain as we think

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I\'m not hungry enough to eat six.

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I\'m not hungry enough to eat six.