W. C. Fields

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

How is the human race going to survive now that the cost of living has gone up two dollars a read more

How is the human race going to survive now that the cost of living has gone up two dollars a quart?

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.

Horse sense is a good judgement which keeps horses from betting on people.

Horse sense is a good judgement which keeps horses from betting on people.