A good, honest, wholesome, hungry breakfast.

A good, honest, wholesome, hungry breakfast.

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

Food has replaced sex in my life, now I can't even get into my own pants

Mosquitoes remind us that we are not as high up on the food chain as we think

Mosquitoes remind us that we are not as high up on the food chain as we think

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

Our lives are not in the lap of the gods, but in the lap of our
cooks.

Our lives are not in the lap of the gods, but in the lap of our
cooks.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate.

Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate.

Sacred cows make the best hamburger

Sacred cows make the best hamburger