I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another read more

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

I admit that: my wife is outspoken, but by whom?

I admit that: my wife is outspoken, but by whom?

Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was read more

A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.