Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are read more

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in read more

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with read more

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it.

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them read more

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.