Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am.

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am.

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at read more

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself.

The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil.

The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil.

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age.

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age.

It is always in season for old men to learn.

It is always in season for old men to learn.

All great men are gifted with intuition. They know without reasoning or analysis, what they need to know.

All great men are gifted with intuition. They know without reasoning or analysis, what they need to know.