As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is read more

I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is hitting below the intellect.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself

The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around.

The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way to literal for me.

I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way to literal for me.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with read more

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it.