Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.

Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot.

I speak two languages, Body and English.

I speak two languages, Body and English.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

I'm here and I'm ready. They're not. Bring it.

I'm here and I'm ready. They're not. Bring it.