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    Once while walking through the mall a guy came up to me and said, 'Hey, how's it going?' So I grabbed his arm and twisted it up behind his head and said 'Now who's asking the questions?'

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I never dare to write
As funny as I can.

I never dare to write
As funny as I can.

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A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke - and that the joke is oneself.

A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke - and that the joke is oneself.

by Clifton Fadiman Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of read more

Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana.

by Lana Turner Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Wit is cultured insolence.

Wit is cultured insolence.

by Aristotle Found in: Humor Quotes, Wit Quotes,
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A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.

A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.

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Those who are serious in ridiculous matters will be ridiculous in serious matters.

Those who are serious in ridiculous matters will be ridiculous in serious matters.

by Cato The Elder Found in: Humor Quotes,
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If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn't open, and you friends are all watching you fall, I think a read more

If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn't open, and you friends are all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were swimming.

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Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully.

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully.

by Max Eastman Found in: Humor Quotes,
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If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw read more

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.

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