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    If I lived back in the wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like 'Hey, look. He's carrying a soldering iron!' and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, 'That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice.' Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the soldering iron of justice.

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  22  /  22  

Humor is not a postscript or an incidental afterthought; it is a serious and weighty part of the world's economy. read more

Humor is not a postscript or an incidental afterthought; it is a serious and weighty part of the world's economy. One feels increasingly the height of the faculty in which it arises, the nobility of things associated with it, and the greatness of services it renders. - Oscar Firkins: Memoirs and Letters.

by Oscar W. Firkins Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Many people think that history is a dull subject. Dull? Is it 'dull' that Jesse James once got bitten on read more

Many people think that history is a dull subject. Dull? Is it 'dull' that Jesse James once got bitten on the forehead by an ant, and at first it didn't seem like anything, but then the bite got worse and worse, so he went to a doctor in town, and the secretary told him to wait, so he sat down and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, and then finally he got to see the doctor, and the doctor put some salve on it? You call that dull?

by Jack Handey Found in: Humor Quotes,
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A rich man's joke is always funny.

A rich man's joke is always funny.

by Thomas Edward Brown Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Puns are a form of humor with words.rn

Puns are a form of humor with words.rn

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The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.

The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.

by Horace Walpole Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.

Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.

by Clive James Found in: Humor Quotes, Laughter Quotes,
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The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another read more

The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance.

by Peter De Vries Found in: Humor Quotes,
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Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but read more

Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.

by Jack Handey Found in: Humor Quotes,
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The gods too are fond of a joke.

The gods too are fond of a joke.

by Edward Albee Found in: Humor Quotes,
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