Maxioms Pet

X
  •   31  /  37  

    To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, 'Hey, can you give me a hand?' you can say, 'Sorry, got these sacks.'

Share to:

You May Also Like   /   View all maxioms

  ( comments )
  16  /  8  

The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another read more

The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance.

by Peter De Vries Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  27  /  28  

That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.

That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.

by Horace Walpole Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  21  /  24  

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

  ( comments )
  25  /  27  

a Christmas tree .. the perfect gift
for a guy... the plant is already dead
(monologue Dec 10 2003).

a Christmas tree .. the perfect gift
for a guy... the plant is already dead
(monologue Dec 10 2003).

by Jay Leno Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  13  /  13  

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things

by George Carlin Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  11  /  7  

Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of read more

Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana.

by Lana Turner Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  34  /  22  

Unconscious humor.

Unconscious humor.

by Samuel Butler Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  22  /  17  

Is anything besides the mind ever boggled?

Is anything besides the mind ever boggled?

by O Anna Niemus Found in: Humor Quotes,
Share to:
  ( comments )
  10  /  18  

If you're robbing a bank and you're pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the read more

If you're robbing a bank and you're pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the hostages laugh too, because, come on, life is funny.

Maxioms Web Pet