Two souls and one thought, two hearts and one pulse.

Two souls and one thought, two hearts and one pulse.

Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in opposite directions, yet always read more

Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing any one who comes between them.

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.

Lasting harmony with a woman (was) an undertaking in which I
twice failed rather disgracefully.

Lasting harmony with a woman (was) an undertaking in which I
twice failed rather disgracefully.

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their read more

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a lot of overlapping.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.

All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.

Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a
bicycle repair kit.

Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a
bicycle repair kit.

To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy read more

To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.