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The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.
The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.
Anybody with a sense of humor is going to put on my album and laugh from beginning to end.
Anybody with a sense of humor is going to put on my album and laugh from beginning to end.
I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one read more
I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it read more
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.
Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter read more
Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is 'God is crying.' read more
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is 'God is crying.' And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is 'Probably because of something you did.'
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live read more
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever.
I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humour.
I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humour.
