Cinema is the most beautiful fraud in the world.

Cinema is the most beautiful fraud in the world.

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. read more

Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause — you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

I don't think you should feel about a film. You should feel about a woman, not a movie. You can't read more

I don't think you should feel about a film. You should feel about a woman, not a movie. You can't kiss a movie.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.

Fortunately I know how to counter it, the man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a read more

Fortunately I know how to counter it, the man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a drink. The man who was sleeping drinks it while listening to a proposition, from the man who did the waking.

Everything makes me nervous - except making films.

Everything makes me nervous - except making films.

Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. 'Get out' and 'I never want to see read more

Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. 'Get out' and 'I never want to see you again' might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, 'I love you.... I want to marry you.... I want to have your children.' Sometimes they leave skid marks.

Now I know I've got a heart, because it's breaking.

Now I know I've got a heart, because it's breaking.

Most of us do not consciously look at movies.

Most of us do not consciously look at movies.