Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

What a man sows, that shall he and his relations reap.

What a man sows, that shall he and his relations reap.

The man that blushes is not quite a brute.

The man that blushes is not quite a brute.

One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who would tell one that would read more

One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who would tell one that would tell one anything.

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as read more

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together.

You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together.

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like read more

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

The family is the school of duties... founded on love.

The family is the school of duties... founded on love.