The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.

The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.

Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing they read more

Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing they die earlier.

Call no man your father upon the earth, for one is your Father, which is in heaven.

Call no man your father upon the earth, for one is your Father, which is in heaven.

He followed in his father's footsteps, but his gait was somewhat erratic.

He followed in his father's footsteps, but his gait was somewhat erratic.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together.

You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together.

Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.

Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.

If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.

If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.

The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run.

The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run.