It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.

In cross-examination, as in fishing, nothing is more ungainly than a fisherman pulled into the water by his catch.

In cross-examination, as in fishing, nothing is more ungainly than a fisherman pulled into the water by his catch.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

Ignorance of the law excuses no man from practicing it.

Ignorance of the law excuses no man from practicing it.

Self-defense is the clearest of all laws, and for this reason: lawyers didn't make it.

Self-defense is the clearest of all laws, and for this reason: lawyers didn't make it.

If the laws could speak for themselves, they would complain of the lawyers.

If the laws could speak for themselves, they would complain of the lawyers.

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor.

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor.

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger.

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger.