A lawyer's dream of heaven: every man reclaimed his property at the resurrection, and each tried to recover it from read more

A lawyer's dream of heaven: every man reclaimed his property at the resurrection, and each tried to recover it from all his forefathers.

Ignorance of the law excuses no man from practicing it.

Ignorance of the law excuses no man from practicing it.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

And whether you're an honest man, or whether you're a thief, Depends on whose solicitor has given me my brief.

And whether you're an honest man, or whether you're a thief, Depends on whose solicitor has given me my brief.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor.

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor.

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger.

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger.

In cross-examination, as in fishing, nothing is more ungainly than a fisherman pulled into the water by his catch.

In cross-examination, as in fishing, nothing is more ungainly than a fisherman pulled into the water by his catch.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.