Samuel Butler

And as the French we conquer'd once,
Now give us laws for pantaloons,
The length of breeches read more

And as the French we conquer'd once,
Now give us laws for pantaloons,
The length of breeches and the gathers
Port-cannons, periwigs, and feathers.

Some force whole regions, in despite
O' geography, to change their site;
Make former times shake hands read more

Some force whole regions, in despite
O' geography, to change their site;
Make former times shake hands with latter,
And that which was before come after;
But those that write in rhyme still make
The one verse for the other's sake;
For one for sense, and one for rhyme,
I think's sufficient at one time.

He'd undertake to prove, by force
Of argument, a man's no horse.
He'd prove a buzzard is read more

He'd undertake to prove, by force
Of argument, a man's no horse.
He'd prove a buzzard is no fowl,
And that a Lord may be an owl,
A calf an Alderman, a goose a Justice,
And rooks, Committee-men or Trustees.

For discords make the sweetest airs.

For discords make the sweetest airs.

And pulpit, drum ecclesiastic,
Was beat with fist instead of a stick.

And pulpit, drum ecclesiastic,
Was beat with fist instead of a stick.