It'd be a terrific innovation if you could get your mind to stretch a little further than the next wisecrack.

It'd be a terrific innovation if you could get your mind to stretch a little further than the next wisecrack.

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes.

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes.

Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.

Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.

I am not going to spend any time whatsoever in attacking the Foreign Secretary. If we complain about the tune, read more

I am not going to spend any time whatsoever in attacking the Foreign Secretary. If we complain about the tune, there is no reason to attack the monkey when the organ grinder is present.

If you can't ignore an insult, top it; if you can't top it, laugh it off; and if you can't read more

If you can't ignore an insult, top it; if you can't top it, laugh it off; and if you can't laugh it off, it's probably deserved.

She has the answer to everything and the solution to nothing.

She has the answer to everything and the solution to nothing.

A wise man is superior to any insults which can be put upon him, and the best reply to unseemly read more

A wise man is superior to any insults which can be put upon him, and the best reply to unseemly behavior is patience and moderation.

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."

I can't believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.

I can't believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.