Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you read more

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you did not know." Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?"

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

If you don't learn to laugh at troubles, you won't have anything to laugh at when you grow old.

If you don't learn to laugh at troubles, you won't have anything to laugh at when you grow old.

I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out read more

I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one read more

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.

Puns are a form of humor with words.rn

Puns are a form of humor with words.rn

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is read more

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's read more

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.

He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.