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I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one read more
I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.
Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that read more
Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. - Inward Ho.
I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver…and since he is so busy, you'd probably read more
I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver…and since he is so busy, you'd probably have to run up to him real quick and give it to him.
If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of humor.
If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of humor.
Wit, like money, bears an extra value when rung down immediately
it is wanted. Men pay severely who require read more
Wit, like money, bears an extra value when rung down immediately
it is wanted. Men pay severely who require credit.
It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously.
It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously.
If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
I am a fool, I know it; and yet, Heaven help me, I'm poor enough
to be a wit.
I am a fool, I know it; and yet, Heaven help me, I'm poor enough
to be a wit.
Miss Piggy to Johnny Carson
.. do you think I am Oscar material?
Johnny Carson: Oscar Mayer maybe
NBC Tonight read more
Miss Piggy to Johnny Carson
.. do you think I am Oscar material?
Johnny Carson: Oscar Mayer maybe
NBC Tonight Show writers
http://www.mad-cow.org.
