I can't believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.

I can't believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.

It'd be a terrific innovation if you could get your mind to stretch a little further than the next wisecrack.

It'd be a terrific innovation if you could get your mind to stretch a little further than the next wisecrack.

A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults.

A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults.

You will find that silence or very gentle words are the most exquisite revenge for insult.

You will find that silence or very gentle words are the most exquisite revenge for insult.

I've had a wonderful evening - but this wasn't it.

I've had a wonderful evening - but this wasn't it.

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."

Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.

Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.

Insults should be written in sand, compliments should be carved in stone

Insults should be written in sand, compliments should be carved in stone

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.