If you want to know about a man you can find out an awful lot by looking at who he read more

If you want to know about a man you can find out an awful lot by looking at who he married.

Want him to be more of a man? Try being more of a woman!

Want him to be more of a man? Try being more of a woman!

If Mr. Vincent Price were to be co-starred with Miss Bette Davis in a story by Mr. Edgar Allan Poe read more

If Mr. Vincent Price were to be co-starred with Miss Bette Davis in a story by Mr. Edgar Allan Poe directed by Mr. Roger Corman, it could not fully express the pent-up violence and depravity of a single day in the life of the average family.

As blushing will sometimes make a whore pass for a virtuous woman, so modesty may make a fool seem a read more

As blushing will sometimes make a whore pass for a virtuous woman, so modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense.

Parents: persons who spend half their time worrying how a child will turn out, and the rest of the time read more

Parents: persons who spend half their time worrying how a child will turn out, and the rest of the time wondering when a child will turn in.

Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.

Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.

I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like read more

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.