The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run.

The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry.

If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry.

A good cigar is as great a comfort to a man as a good cry is to a woman.

A good cigar is as great a comfort to a man as a good cry is to a woman.

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get read more

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.