Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.

Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.

If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.

If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.

You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they get older.

You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they get older.

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. read more

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".

If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry.

If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry.

I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how read more

I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting.

Such a wife as I want... must be young, handsome I lay most stress upon a good shape, sensible a read more

Such a wife as I want... must be young, handsome I lay most stress upon a good shape, sensible a little learning will do, well-bread, chaste, and tender. As to religion, a moderate stock will satisfy me. She must believe in God and hate a saint.

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.

Ceremony and ritual spring from our heart of hearts: those who govern us know it well, for they would sooner read more

Ceremony and ritual spring from our heart of hearts: those who govern us know it well, for they would sooner deny us bread than dare alter the observance of tradition.