Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

Lawyers are like morticians. We all need one sooner or later, but better later than sooner.

To some lawyers, all facts are created equal.

To some lawyers, all facts are created equal.

God works wonders now and then; Behold a lawyer, an honest man.

God works wonders now and then; Behold a lawyer, an honest man.

The trouble with law is lawyers.

The trouble with law is lawyers.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

It took man thousands of years to put words down on paper, and his lawyers still wish he wouldn't.

And whether you're an honest man, or whether you're a thief, Depends on whose solicitor has given me my brief.

And whether you're an honest man, or whether you're a thief, Depends on whose solicitor has given me my brief.

I never saw a lawyer yet who would admit he was making money.

I never saw a lawyer yet who would admit he was making money.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers.

Self-defense is the clearest of all laws, and for this reason: lawyers didn't make it.

Self-defense is the clearest of all laws, and for this reason: lawyers didn't make it.