Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

I am no longer a curmudgeon.
I am a curmudgeon emeritus.

I am no longer a curmudgeon.
I am a curmudgeon emeritus.

I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.

I've always been very zealous about not invading other people's private spaces.

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold read more

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. 'Hear that?' you say, 'That's dynamite, baby.'

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.

The seal went into the restaurant and was asked
by the waiter if he would like a Canadian Club
on read more

The seal went into the restaurant and was asked
by the waiter if he would like a Canadian Club
on the rocks.
He replied
no thank you.

The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain.

The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain.

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the read more

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road.