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  11  /  9  

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.

by Groucho Marx Found in: Funny Quotes,
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  12  /  16  

I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.

I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.

by Mitch Hedberg Found in: Funny Quotes,
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Many are destined to reason wrongly; others, not to reason at all; and others, to persecute those who do reason.

Many are destined to reason wrongly; others, not to reason at all; and others, to persecute those who do reason.

by Voltaire Found in: Reason Quotes,
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Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story read more

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.

by Helen Rowland Found in: Funny Quotes,
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This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

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Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

by Oscar Wilde Found in: Funny Quotes, Marriage Quotes,
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The heart has reasons that reason does not understand.

The heart has reasons that reason does not understand.

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To give a reason for anything is to breed a doubt of it.

To give a reason for anything is to breed a doubt of it.

by William Hazlitt Found in: Reason Quotes,
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Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

Existentialism means that no one else can take a bath for you.

by Delmore Schwartz Found in: Funny Quotes,
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