Woody Allen

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I
looked into the soul of the boy read more

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I
looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: read more

If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children".

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve
it through not dying.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve
it through not dying.

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.