Woody Allen

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy read more

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.