I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, read more

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not.

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not.

If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher.

If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher.

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be read more

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness of one.

She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness of one.

What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to read more

What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be trusted, and sometimes, just to be held. What Men Want: Tickets for the world series.

If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.

If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.