Don't you realize that as long as you have to sit down to pee, you'll never be a dominant force read more

Don't you realize that as long as you have to sit down to pee, you'll never be a dominant force in the world? You'll never be a convincing technocrat or middle manager. Because people will know. She's in there sitting down.

A gentleman will not insult me, and no man not a gentleman can insult me.

A gentleman will not insult me, and no man not a gentleman can insult me.

Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.

Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at.

I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as read more

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

We say that a girl with her doll anticipates the mother. It is more true, perhaps, that most mothers are read more

We say that a girl with her doll anticipates the mother. It is more true, perhaps, that most mothers are still but children with playthings.

Only a few human beings should grow to the square mile; they are commonly planted too close.

Only a few human beings should grow to the square mile; they are commonly planted too close.

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.