I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend, and my best read more

I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend, and my best friend's my wife. Who could ask for anything more?

Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim.

Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim.

I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at.

Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at.

I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including: * Both of your socks should always be read more

I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including: * Both of your socks should always be the same color * Or they should at least both be fairly dark.

A commitment to sexual equality with males is a commitment to becoming the rich instead of the poor, the rapist read more

A commitment to sexual equality with males is a commitment to becoming the rich instead of the poor, the rapist instead of the raped, the murderer instead of the murdered.

Family jokes, though rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive.

Family jokes, though rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive.

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.

The government is becoming the family of last resort.

The government is becoming the family of last resort.